Tongue-tied

Even though this is an English-speaking country, I'm still having my fair share of communication snafus. Especially in towns like Toowoomba and St George, I sometimes get grimaces when I open my mouth and speak, as well as a fair number of blank stares and giggles. Sometimes people use it as a handy excuse not to help me out. I have to fight the feeling of reluctance when it comes to speaking-- force myself to make phone calls and the like. As I walked back from the post office the other day after a confusing set of misunderstandings between me and the cashier, I felt a new-found empathy for people in the US (0r anywhere) who might speak the language perfectly but face prejudice, ridicule, and self-consciousness because of their accent. It can feel like a big hurdle.

On the lighter side, communication difficulties have led to many a hilarious moment. Here are a few:

Me: What time are you coming in tomorrow?

Jason: Well it won't be sparrow's fart.

Me: Uhh...

At this, our section of the office erupted in laughter and Jason explained to me that the sparrow gets the early worm, after which he has a nice fart. Translation: I won't be in very early, that's for sure.

Me: Where is the new supply closet?

Terrie: Supply closet? Ah, you would be meaning the stationary cupboard. The closest we've got to a closet is the water closet-- the loo.

Jason: That's a neat honey squeeze bottle you've got.

Me: Yeah, I had to get it because it had this cute koala bear on it.

Everyone in unison: A KOALA IS NOT A BEAR!

Much laughter ensued.

Me: Why don't we meet at Coffee Club on Margaret Street?

Neil: Sure. Your shout?

Me: Huh?

Neil: Your shout?

Silence.

Neil: Are you buying me coffee?

Me: Ohh! Sorry, I haven't got the slang down quite yet.

Lots of chortling from the office mates.

[Everyone seemed to think this was one I should know. Has anyone ever heard "your shout" in a bar or other situation where you're treating people in the US? Am I just oblivious?]

Other things I'm learning:

peanut butter = peanut paste

dunny = toilet

The Lodge = the Prime Minister's residence in Canberra

"Fanny" and the verb "to root" are not appropriate. Ever. Poor Carrie Underwood has received a lot of attention lately for saying she would be rooting for one of the rugby teams while she was here. Oooooops!